Monday, 1 February 2010

You know you are domesticated when........

you are going to clean your house because a joiner is coming in the morning and
One * He is a man and like most men won't be paying any attention to dust.
Two * Even if he were to notice said dust, what do I care if he thinks my house needs dusting.
But I do care and I know I shouldn't.  I don't want him to be able to utter to anyone that for someone who doesn't have a job, my house is a tip.  It feels like a tip most of the time but that isn't the point.  I don't want other people to know this.  I have a decidedly love/hate relationship with keeping house.  On the one hand I rebel like buggery and feel I shouldn't have to be domesticated and I will not do chores if I don't want to and the house won't fall down because it's a bit dusty.  It's a long, long, long way off from an episode of 'How clean is your house?' so I can procrastinate all I like.  Yet on the other hand I do feel like it's my job and I want to do a good job.  Being my own *boss* means I have the power to decide my hours etc and that is where the problem lays.  I can be proclaim 'manyana' at a drop of a hat and so I do quite often, particularly when I have a project on the go.  It was different before my boys went to school, I had a lot of 'had to' things and just got on with it, complaining of course, but I got on with it.  Now because I have a bit of choice in how to spend my day I giggle to myself, have a bit of mischief and don't do as much as I should.
I wonder if it's a reaction to it being so full on when my boys were younger.  Being a mum, does not mean doing what you like, there is little choice in how your day will pan out but now I get to choose, there's no one else here, it's just me.
It's the challenge of being a woman.  Feeling like you should be house proud and at the same time thinking there's more to life than housework.  Being at home may give you more time for chores but it doesn't necessarily make for a stimulating life.  Getting the balance is the tricky thing. Does anyone out there ever get the balance right?  Don't hate me working mums who may think I have a right cheek to complain when I haven't got a job.  Not working is not like being on holiday from work, it's filled with supposed to's and waiting for everyone to come home from their lives, it doen't feel like a privilege. We are all trying to get the balance whether at home or at work. Like I said, do any of us feel we get the balance right?
So I do a bit of the Lazy Princess routine and get on with the washing, rebel a bit then clean the toilets, procrastinate a lot then get the iron out.  Compose a post then clean the whole house for a workman who is just going to cover it in saw dust anyways.
Modern woman me!



  1. Hear, hear!

    Ali, what a BRILLIANT post.

    When I go into my local bank on a weekday, the teller behind the counter ALWAYS says "so, have you got the day off work today?". I'm afraid to say I often respond with a "yes, catching up on a few jobs" or something similar. Not because I am ashamed of not having a paid job. Not because I give a damn about what he/she might think. It's just easier.

    Next time, with you in mind, I promise I shall reply "a day off? I should be so lucky - I'm a full time mum, wife and housekeeper, we don't get days off".


  2. You hit it right on the nose there. Being jobless at present I feel compelled to clean the house. I literally just finished the dishes 5 minutes ago...

    More often than not our house is still a total sty and I don't mind so much, yet I was horrified by the thought that our house guests on saturday might actually think we live like pigs.


  3. I agree too! I have to make bargains with myself for what will happen in the 2 hours I get while the baby sleeps - if I clean the bathroom THEN I can have a sit down and do some crochet with a cup of coffee, etc, etc. It works most of the time, but if anything gets compromised it is the cleaning not the coffee & crochet!!

  4. Hi Ali, I think its very difficult to get the balance right. I too make bargains with myself but because i get so easily distracted this doesn't always work for me xxx

  5. I just had a thought - all over there are women like us sitting in their houses in the day, thinking about what ought to be cleaned and thinking they would rather do something more creative instead. Hundred and hundreds of women!!!! Maybe we should do each others then it wouldn't be so boring!! (and we'd probably have cleaned up first anyway!!) x

  6. I find myself putting off the housework quite often, but as soon as I know I have someone coming round I seem to transform into Mrs Beaton, cleaning making coffee and (not so much since baby) baking. It's very odd.
    But as I too am a long way from having Kim and Aggy as house guests think I am fine. I am showered, diddy dude is clean, cleanly dressed (kinda) fed and gigging why does my dis organsied LIVING room matter, after all it's for living in...

  7. Wise words....

    Working mum here. Spend my time when not at work either running around like a noodle or procrastinating about what I need to do, and feeling really cheesed off, when as fast as I have done something, its undone. I think its the boring repetitiveness of it all that gets me. & people seem to not value the effort that goes into day - to - day homemaking, wether you are WM or a SAHM.

    I think as women - we rarely get a day off...

    Love Lydia xx

  8. take a look at this shocking post on a similar theme!!! hee hee!! I was mortified afterwards! But I felt better on hitting publish! arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Ali...bollocks to it! Thats what I say!! (hahahaha...think I have a touch of the Ole Nick today!) x


I love to hear from all you interesting folks out there so don't be shy.
Had to put the annoying word verification back on as the spam was getting silly. Forgive me! Ali


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